Skin of Lotus
It was my 28th birthday. I was anxiously waiting in the chamber of a pediatric retina specialist. My twins, who had been born in the 26th week (six and a half months) of pregnancy, had been diagnosed with advanced ROP (Retinopathy of Prematurity). They were undergoing major optical surgery. The operation on Lotus was unsuccessful. Suddenly I felt I couldn't breath. I looked around me but everything was as it should be, except me.
Things gradually crumbled at home. Her mother was scared to take her out for fear of rude comments. After two years she developed seizures, the neurologist said it was due to excessive electron flow through her brain. I was deeply upset at her restless behavior. But then I discovered something which gave me hope. I realised that the eye was not everything. It was the touch sensation which made her normal, which made her life easier. Touching a surface can make one's heart race, bring forth tears or make one burst out into laughter. It enables one to get the gist of a thing unconsciously, it is the first language, also the last. It always tells the truth.
The “Skin of Lotus” is a photography story which reveals my views of life and love, my new perspective and my journey. It is a story of contradictions, doubts and understanding, of laughter and forgetting, one in which I constantly question myself by documenting the painful aspects of my life which might otherwise have seemed disconnected.
I have inserted braille text into my daughter’s portrait to present her from different perspectives, her speech and thoughts. I have also used Polaroid photographs shot by my twins.
According to medical science, it's unlikely Lotus will get her vision back. But I so wish she could see these photographs!